I wanted to share my self care routine because it is totally working for me, and it might just work for you, too.
Here's my "how to" to self care:
1. Pick a time that you can dedicate to self care every single day.
This might be 10 minutes or an entire hour. You might have to MAKE this time in your busy schedule, so pick a time that you can test out. I take 10-20 minutes in the morning while my husband takes care of our daughter, and 30 minutes - 1 hour in the evening after she goes to bed.
2. Ask for help.
This might mean having a conversation with your partner about why this is important to you, and asking them to help so you can have this time uninterrupted. I didn't think I had time in the mornings, but then I remembered that my husband is perfectly capable of feeding our daughter breakfast by himself, so I asked for his support. Bonus, he encourages me to take this time when I want to skip it! In the evenings, sometimes I ask my husband to put our daughter to bed if I know I need some extra me-time after a hard day.
3. Make this time feel SPECIAL and IMPORTANT.
Otherwise, it's easy to mindlessly start the social media scroll or check emails. In the mornings, I have an entire ritual. I light a candle, say a few words about why I'm showing up, burn some sage, pick out some gemstones, sniff some essential oil, then sit in silence for a moment. Sometimes, that's literally all I do. Other times, I journal or do a longer meditation. I always say a word of gratitude before I blow out my candle. In the evenings, I just light a candle to signify my self care time has started.
4. Plan something that excites you so you don't skip out.
It's easier to skip out when you have no idea of what to do. How you spend this time will be a bit of trial and error. I'm learning what activities leave me feeling nourished/calm/centered, and which ones don't. I'm more likely to show up in the mornings when it's a New Moon and I have a ritual planned, or if I am in the middle of a larger art project. That being said, there will be days when you didn't plan anything and you are just not in the mood. Eventually, you will have some super simple go-to's that take next to no energy. For me, that might be scribbling in a sketchbook or taking a bath.
5. Assess and adjust if necessary. This time should NOT feel like a chore.
I still catch myself doing things that are disguised as "self care", but are really just me trying to be productive. There will be times after your self care that you don't feel replenished. Take note of why that is. This practice may bring up feelings of unworthiness if a part of you thinks self care is selfish. Over time, this will heal once you EXPERIENCE that self care is in fact not selfish.
Some self care ideas:
Yoga (Take a class or freestyle)
Dance (find a room with privacy, put on some inspiring or sexy music)
Candle-lit bath or shower
Tea & a book
Meditation (guided or silent)
Journal & Doodle
Alter time: prayer, ritual, tarot, etc.
Play/Learn an instrument
If you are interested in what my creative self care looks like, I share a lot of it on Instagram @RedFernStudio.
May this inspire you to start your own journey towards more self love through self care practices.